What do YOU do to stop working at the end of the day?
When you’re self-employed, the time clock doesn’t dictate when you punch out.
Ending the work day is something that many people struggle with. It’s a topic that came up last week at the Superlicious Diva Business Day, and I realized that it’s a big problem for me, too.
Here’s what I doing to stop working at the end of the day
What is currently working well for me:
Schedule something at the end of the day. At 6ish every evening, Inspired Spouse and I eat dinner together. It’s an agreement. Not only do we both enjoy it, when I know dinner’s waiting – or it’s my turn to make it – I just stop working. It’s more important to me to keep that commitment than it is to goof around on Facebook.
Find other things to do with myself in the evening and on weekends. Not too long ago, gave myself the evening off and I paced around anxiously trying to figure out what to *do* with myself. It’s laughable now, but I was seriously stressed at the time. What do I do if I’m not working?
My current strategy is having stuff to focus on besides work. I’ve got a big stack of books to veg out with in the evenings. And, on weekends, Inspired Spouse and I talk about and negotiate what chores we’ll do and what fun activities we’d like to partake in. Last weekend, for example, we went to the Aumsville Corn Festival (fantastic!) and saw the movie Julie & Julia (delightful!). A year ago, I was not doing this kind of fun stuff, so this is serious progress.
What I’m currently working on
I’m working very long hours. That’s just the fact. I’m not even working on it yet. All I’m doing at this point is noticing (which is, in itself, powerful).
What I notice is that most days I’m at my desk by 7am and I usually work until about 6pm, 3 days a week. Every night, I usually end up back in my office after dinner to answer email, do twitter and Facebook stuff, and answer blog posts. I like doing this – but some days I feel exhausted.
In total, including my part-time job, (grabs calculator) I’m working about 72 hours a week. Whew! No wonder!
Creating boundaries around my work time. This is the thing I’d like to work on most. I’m not exactly sure what my needs are yet since I’m still in the Noticing Phase. But I know that if I stay open and curious, I’ll get clarity about what to do next.
I’ll keep you posted. 
What do YOU do to stop working at the end of the day?
What works really well for you? What are you working on?
Share your insights and ideas! Your comments on your own process are welcome. I also request kindly, firmly, that you not give advice to me or others unless it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.
887 days ago,
Mark Silver said:
Eventually my eyes blur, and my head falls onto my keyboard… or is that the wrong answer?
For me, my new family (twin nearly-10-month-old boys) are very effective at getting me to stop work. Family time pre-empts work time, just like you and your spouse with dinner.
887 days ago,
Emma Newman said:
So glad you can’t see my blushes. I am *terrible* at this. I find it almost impossible to relax. I’m trying to find something to make me stop earlier, and have made a concerted effort to have at least a couple of hours relaxation at the end of the day – but my brain just doesn’t stop.
887 days ago,
Léan Ní Chuilleanáin said:
What is this “stop working” of which you speak?
Dinner, followed by my two little boys’ bedtime, is an effective break in my evening, but unfortunately, their being asleep is often the one thing that allows me to get some work done! So I have a tendency to work right up to my own bedtime, which is not good.
Having books to read, crafts to do, and an appointment to watch a DVD with my husband helps. But not if there’s a deadline.
886 days ago,
Gina said:
LOL.. yeah, stopping. What is that, right?
Well, this may not be the best practice, but I’ve developed a Pavlovian response to 5pm dinner prep time to crack open a lager. I often intend to get back to do another hour or two later, but my mind and motivation are just not in the same place. I’m not drunk or anything, mind you
just relaxed.
I’m learning how to let that be punctuation enough, so I can get ready for the next day. Cheap date for hubs and me lately has been heckling the tv every night.
Great fun!
.-= Gina´s last blog ..Hello, My Name Is… =-.
886 days ago,
Vicky White said:
Jen – you’re obviously not the only one! I sometimes look at what these kind of hours make my hourly rate! Sobering….. but like you, my best solution is to have something else planned – especially with someone else involved – but then as an introvert it’s too much to do that every day! Easy to get into that wandering the house wondering what I’m meant to be doing – emails etc create some structure that’s comfortable – which means structure has to be the way to go for me – perhaps more definite structure with myself – and yummy treats planned (not of the food kind!).
886 days ago,
Jennifer Louden said:
Declaring a set time to stop each day, and it differs each day, helps. Deciding ahead of time (key!!) what to look forward to and what I really want to do that evening, also helps. Being in love helps, having a teenager, loving to read!
884 days ago,
jennifer said:
@Mark – Kiddos will definitely keep you on track. I’ll bet, in your pre-parental days, you aren’t kidding about the drowsy eyes.
@Emma – You are in SUCH good company.
@Lean – Great thoughts. I love how you have all kinds of things you *could* do if you decided to stop.
@Gina – Ahhh… The Lager Strategy. Kinda kills the motivation to relax with a brew and hang out with loved ones. Sounds like it works like a charm!
@Vicky – Calculating the hourly rate is a great idea. Sobering. I love all your other ideas, too. Sounds like you’ve got some great strategies worked out (even if they don’t always work). Nice to see you here!
@Jennifer – Exactly. I love your strategies… I think that you and Lean are inspiring me to write a list of Things I Like To Do when I’ve stopped working. And I promise you it won’t have any housework on it.