I still have 2 cards to go, but I just had to share the success! I’ve been writing about my credit card debt for a while now and it’s thrilling to have this accomplishment under my belt.

Other things I’ve done lately to get the other 2 moving forward:

• Transferred a high APR balance to a lower APR card.
• Set a goal for how much I pay each month for all the cards and stick to it.
• Pay off more than my goal when possible.

I’ve also discovered an inspiring blog called Get Rich Slowly, which applies Slow Movement concepts to personal finance. The blog is full of common sense advice with a dose of humor and zen. If you’re struggling with debt and cash flow, I highly recommend it.

At this point, I have 2 years, 8 months left to go before I’m done with credit card debt for good. It’s slow progress, but boy does it feel good!

************************************

Abundance is here.

Do you have more stuff than you want — more paper, more books, more email, more commitments, more bills? If you’re trying to manifest abundance, stop! It’s already here! Most people I know have more to do in one week than a person could truly appreciate in a month or more.

This isn’t what we imagine abundance should look like. Personally, I imagined lying on a lounge chair on a warm beach, sipping something with a tiny umbrella in it. Ahhh.

But the abundance I have (and maybe you do too) is not the least bit relaxing. I never imagined that “abundance” would masquerade through my life as a cluttered stress-ball, but there it is.

Give me simplicity.

For many, the road from to simplicity is rocky. We like having things. We like being wanted. “I’m busy” makes us feel important. It can be hard to let go of the short-term payoffs, but this much intensity can create overwhelm in the long run.

Ask anyone whose desk is so full of paper and treasures that they can’t complete their taxes on time and are scrambling for an extension. Ask anyone who, literally, can’t find time to pee. It isn’t the kind of abundance they wanted, either, and it can suck the joy out of life.

The #1 sneaky lie that attracts overwhelm:

“I can fit it in.”

If you hear yourself say these words, freeze. This is your ego speaking.

The ego is a very specific kind of master: a task master. The ego doesn’t want simplicity, it craves complexity and drama. It wants you to be overextended.

If you want more simplicity in your life, you can beat the ego at its own game so you can act upon your deeper desires.

To do this, first it’s important to know how letting the ego rule your life and your calendar affects you.

Consequence 1: Antagonizing loved ones and strangers.

The more we attempt to fit in, the greater the chances the fight-or-flight response getting triggered.

Stress from over-commitment brings out the worst in people. Instead of being present, we’re testy. Instead of accepting, irritable. Instead of forgiving, we guilt-trip. Sometimes we hold those feelings in, which hurts our own hearts as well.

Consequence 2: Missed opportunities for connection

One night last week, Inspired Spouse came into my office to talk while I was finishing up “one last thing” that I “needed” to do. Truthfully, I heard only every 4th word and listened just enough to appease. Later, I realized that I’d missed a precious opportunity to meaningfullyconnect with my Most Important Person.

When we hurry, we miss opportunities to connect.

Consequence 3: Engaging in risky behaviors

While we’re over-committed and feeling rushed, we hurry to catch up. Traffic laws become negotiable. We tailgate. We cut people off in traffic. We speed. Suddenly our urgency is at the expense of others’ needs, including our own safety.

Consequence 4: Satisfaction denied

Cramming more to-dos into your day deprives you of the satisfaction of completing a job or task thoroughly. Many people don’t stop long enough to enjoy the feeling of completion, before rushing headlong into whatever is next. Life becomes an endless, depressing mound of stuff to do before we die.

Consequence 5: Craving more. Andmoreandmore.

It’s been proven that the faster a person eats, the greater the likelihood of overeating. The same could be said for internet usage, TV watching, gambling, reading, et cetera. When we rush to cram it all in, we immediately start to crave more because we never really have it in the first place. We’re not present enough.

Geneen Roth wisely said, “You can’t have enough of what you don’t really want.” She was speaking of food specifically — that no amount of Oreos can equal a relaxing soak in the tub. This applies to lots of other things, too. No amount of money can feel like love. Even 100 completed “to-dos” doesn’t feel like a talk with a good friend.

So what?

None of these observations is intended to convey that doing stuff is bad. On the contrary. Doing stuff is good, so long as it’s not done at the expense of your spirit and others who share the planet with you. I know that’s a tall order. I’m working on it myself.

Alternatives to “fitting it all in”.

Instead of cramming more into your day or onto your desk, here are a few suggestions to prevent “fitting more in”.

Know your limits

Reflect on how many hours of work will sustain you without creating burnout. Do you know how many social engagements can you handle each month and still enjoy yourself? Think about how many activities you really want to drive your kids to every week. When you have some limits established, it can be easier to maintain a healthy schedule and work load.

Build in buffer time.

Instead of scheduling your plans and tasks back-to-back, plan for things to take longer. My weekly appointment is a 20-minute drive, but traffic is always sketchy. When I started giving myself 30 minutes for the drive, I stopped driving like a speed demon and arrived calmer. Where might you need some buffer time?

Practice pausing.

Whether someone is asking for your time, or you’ve got something to add to your plate, catch yourself in the moment (when you can) and ask:

• Do I have to fit this in?
• Do I want to?
• Do I need (life or death) to do this?

You may choose the same way as before, but bringing consciousness to your choices makes you feel more empowered and less a victim of your “to-dos”.

Practice saying “no” kindly.

Most people think that if they’re asked, they should say yes. If you know that your week is at capacity, saying yes can push us over the edge. Saying “no” doesn’t have to be negative. When someone asks you to get together, focus on the intention behind the ask. Don’t assume that you are the only one who can handle it. Negotiate. (hint: I’m planning a fun event on this topic soon!)

Stop to celebrate and acknowledge your efforts.

Instead of rushing to the next thing, it can be profoundly satisfying to stop long enough to appreciate your efforts and recognize your accomplishments. Sometimes I ask others to do the same for me when I have a hard time believing it myself.

In the end

The contented life isn’t about having more, it’s having less and appreciating how abundant that really is.

May your week be less packed and your life more full.

Warmly,
Jennifer

Thoughts? Yeah, buts? Me toos?

The goal: Unsubscribe from as many automatic emails as possible

Why we don’t do it

You just want to get through your email, right? I know I do! So when we receive unwanted email, reactively clicking “delete” does the trick — in the short run.

By contrast, unsubscribing takes an extra couple of steps. You usually have to scroll to the bottom of the email and click “unsubscribe”. Sometimes you have to go to a website and enter your email address or click a button. Some sites even ask you to tell them why you’re “leaving”.

So, one of the reasons why we don’t unsubscribe is that it takes extra time and thought. We’re busy.

The other reason we don’t: Relationships

I have a friend who receives all of her friends newsletters, probably 20 in total each month, and she “can’t” unsubscribe because she doesn’t want to hurt their feelings.

Can you relate? Maybe you had good intentions when you signed up, but now you never read them. Or you aren’t interested in the topic. Or you’re just not close anymore. Whatever the reason, every time you get one of those emails, you get a little dose of guilt along with it.

Take courage. If you take a moment to explain why you’re unsubscribing, chances are good that you won’t permanently damage the relationship. Something like, “Unsubscribing helps me create more simplicity in my life. I still value our connection.” As long as it’s honest, this keeps the door open.

Why it’s useful

Unsubbing is useful because it can drastically reduce the volume and sheer numbers of email you receive weekly. Imagine only receiving emails you want!

It also saves you a lot of time, not just from clearing your inbox, but also prevent you getting distracted by reading things that don’t interest you. You can be more focused when the items in your inbox are relevant to your work.

How to do it

Are you sold on the idea yet? If you are, the key is mindfulness.

Host an email mindfulness party. For the next week, every time you check your inbox, ask yourself these questions when you open an email:

• Do I want this?
• If no, where did it come from?
• Is there a way to prevent this in the future?
• Take that next step to prevent future emails — and unsubscribe.

Practice this for just a week and chances are good that your email load will become lighter. You’ll be able to focus on doing what you love and less time on what you don’t.

Thoughts on unsubscribing? Yeah, buts? Me toos?

Tax day is a mere month away.

If you’re the kind of person who puts off onerous tasks, you might be feeling a little overwhelmed right now. Okay, maybe a lot. I know I have.

This is an encouraging space. You can speak your truth.

So, how’s it going?

I’m curious. With a month remaining…

1. What’s going well? What do you already have figured out and feel confident on?

2. What’s in the way? Maybe it’s just getting the time, or something more insidious like overwhelm or beliefs about your abilities.

3. What’s next? I don’t mean “just finish my taxes”. I mean, what are 2 or 3 incremental baby steps you plan to take next to get your taxes closer to completion?

Feel like checking in?

I’d love to hear from you and how it’s going!

Warmly,
Jen

Leah Piken Kolidas

Website: www.bluetreeartgallery.com
Blog: www.creativeeveryday.com

What she does: Leah is an artist who sells her originals and prints, and teaches others how to use their creativity.

What she loves best about her office: The light, the views of trees

How her office helps her: It’s still new to her, but in her new space she notices that she sees lots more possibility in her business.

Leah’s everyday genius idea: She creates a visual to-do list in her sketch book, drawing images that go along with the items on her to-do list.

Listen to the recording (13 minutes)

Genius quote:

“Doodling helps people people absorb information and think.”
- Leah Piken Kolidas

Perspective.

If you peek into a day in the life of the average entrepreneur you’ll see email, social networking, appointments, bills, writing, more email, returning messages, home-life interruptions, and more.

Ever-present is the feeling that there’s not enough time to do it all – and the urge to get some space to sort it all out. Is any of this busy work helping?

Here’s what I do to get perspective

• Quarterly 4-day retreats – Back in September, I acknowledged that if I didn’t change how I ran myself in my biz, my head would likely blow up. Making a commitment to quarterly retreats seemed huge and scary. Now that I’ve already been on 2 of them, I’m finding that I feel emotionally and spiritually replenished AND I have more clarity about where I’m going and what I’m doing in my work. Now I’m unapologetic about taking that much time “off”.

• Monthly weekend retreats - This year I’m experimenting with a monthly overnight retreat in addition to the quarterly ones. My first one is at the end of January. Expect a good report.

• Weekly check-ins – As I type this, I’m thinking that this “quarterly/monthly/weekly” thing might sound too structured to you. It’s arbitrary, but helps me bring a rhythm to the ritual of stepping out of the “daily” and looking at the big picture.

Anyway, I meet weekly by phone with one of the coolest bizbuds ever. Marissa and I check in on last week’s progress and then work for a few hours together on our separate projects. At the end of our call, we state aloud our goals for the coming week.

Having someone who really sees what’s happening in my biz, helps me set realistic goals, and who looks forward to my progress updates (and I hers) motivates me like nothing else.

• The 2 column list – Also a weekly thing on Mondays, I stand up to write this list of “steps I will do this week or delegate to the divine” which gives me physical perspective (instead of sitting hunched at my desk) and a feeling of authority. It’s easy to read from my desk, so I can decide what to work on next that gets me closer to my goals.

Here’s what’s in the works

• Long term destination – Inspired by a recent talk by Robert Fritz, I realized that I want a clearer definition of where I and my biz are headed in the next 5 years. Something visible and, better yet, tangible. I don’t know how or what it is yet (and that’s just fine), realizing and naming that I want it will help me create it.

What do you do that gives you perspective?

Your turn! If you’d like, please share what you’re doing that helps you get perspective in your business and/or life – and also something that you’re working on/experimenting with.

Your comments on your own process are welcome. Just remember to give advice to me or others only when it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

Names.

I dread those grocery-store moments. We’ve already locked eyes. A greeting is imminent. And my heart starts to thud because I have no idea what the person’s name is.

Having lived in Salem for 12 years and having held numerous jobs in which I met hundreds of new people every year, forgetting names and personal details is bound to happen. I feel added pressure, however, because some of those people are past clients who’ve hired me at Inspired Home Office.

At an inauguration party last year, I ran into a wonderful woman I recognized (and good thing – as I had worked with her in her home for several months), I just couldn’t remember her name. In fact, twice that night, I introduced her to others by the wrong name – and didn’t realize it until I’d gotten home later. Oh, the embarassment.

You can see why I go to such lengths to avoid the pain of making such a personal mistake. Most of us do!

Here’s what I do remember names

• Rely on synesthetic information - I have a fun and crazy brain thing called synesthesia – in which I perceive all the letters of the alphabet to have a color. In other words, the letter “j”, to me is pink. If a person’s name starts with the letter “m”, usually the whole name is also blue. Inspired Spouse thinks this is a neato-fun party trick. Synesthesia is pretty handy for remembering names because I remember the color better than the name. Odd. But fun.
• Repetition - When I meet people, especially if it’s someone I’m likely to meet again, I ask them to repeat their name for me. I ask how they spell their name. I say it again if possible during our conversation. At gatherings, I’ll go around the room and (to myself) say each person’s name. My test is to see how many people I can say goodbye to by name.

• Writing it down - At meetings, I’ll draw a little seating chart and write the names of everyone present as they introduce themselves. Even if I already know them well – sometimes I totally blank. I ask for business cards and write details on the back to help me remember more about them. When I teach in-person classes, I use name tags or table tents so their name is visible.
• Stories - People love to talk about themselves and I’m genuinely curious. So if a person has an interesting name – and we have a little time to talk – I ask them to tell me the story of their name. Not only do I learn something often personal and tender about them, but this also gives me repetition, synesthetic info, and a story – which is a lot more to go on if I ever meet them in the grocery store.

Here’s what I’m working on

• Recovery – If I draw a total blank on a name, I will usually default to my smiling, open self, apologize, and ask for a refresher. I sometimes ask for details about how we know each other. Usually, once I have enough context, I remember lots of things about the person. I just have to be patient with myself while I’m catching up.

• Forgiveness - When I thought up this post, I thought it would be cute and fun, but I’m realizing that I have a lot of shame (and evidently high expectations of myself) that I don’t remember names easily. Being gentle with myself is probably the hardest thing of all, but I’m getting there. I’m human. We all are.

What do YOU do that helps you remember names?

Your turn! If you’d like, please share what you’re doing that helps you remember names – and also something that you’re working on/experimenting with.

Your comments on your own process are welcome. Just remember to give advice to me or others only when it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

When I first mentioned my credit card debt last summer, tons of people commented with relief, “So it’s not just me who’s working on this!” I still can’t believe that I shared my total number, but I’m going to do it again. And also a cool tool you might want to try.

My numbers, today:

Total: $28,621 (down $1,784 since last August!)
Card 1 9.9%: 4,712 (down $679)
Card 2a 2.9%: 1,420 (down $633)
Card 2b 34.9%: 2,522 (down $56)
Card 3 23.9%: 14,467 (down $416)
(Update: Bank of M&D Loan 0%: $5500)

The bad news:

Out of the $4,800 I’ve actually paid to these companies over the last 5 months, only a fraction of that amount went towards paying down principal.

But it wasn’t just the interest rate that got me. I take responsibility for the 2 late-fee payments because my bill-paying system isn’t working effectively enough. And the increased APR on Card 3 as a result of one of those late payments. It’s ouchie, yes. I had some big emotions about it (mad, sad, giving up, etc.). But there it is. Those slip-ups cost me cash.

The good news:

Gosh, it feels good to be in the 20’s – and out of the 30’s!

The plan: Even with the setbacks, I’m on track. My plan is working: pay a set amount every month that exceeds the minimum payment. I won’t bore you with the intricacies of that plan, but in short, I’m paying as much as possible on the highest APR accounts first. And this highest % happens to be the lowest balance, so I’ll be excited to get that one outta here!

New laws: On February 18th, the new credit card legislation goes into effect (CCARD details) and the payments I make to Card 2 (which has 2 different interest rates) will start going to the higher interest account, not the lower. Thank you muchly, Pres. Obama, Congress and Senate! That will put more of my money toward paying them off.

Cool tool: The cool tool I found is a credit card pay-off calculator. According to this tool from CNN Money, it will take me 3 years and 3 months to eliminate my debt if I keep paying the same amount ($800/month). And only about 25% of that will be interest. What, you might wonder, would it be if I only pay the minimum balance? A nice, round 30 years to pay it all off – and about 75% of that would go toward interest.

If that’s not an incentive, I don’t know what is.

Do you wonder how long it will take you? Get out your most recent statements and fill out the online debt calculator (completely anonymous).

Share if you like – what are your most recent successes toward getting out of debt?

Today, I’m inviting smARTists and regular readers to share:

What’s one tweak you’d like to experiment with that would help you feel more focused or organized?

And if you’re in the smARTist program this week, you’re also welcome to share something from my presentation that you’re planning to try out.

Why are you asking this?

It is so powerful to state an intention out loud and to have respectful, encouraging witnesses. By creating a place to witness your tweaky intention, you have a better chance of making it happen.

Before you think I’m obsessed with dry, boring organizy stuff, think about it. When you work alone, it’s easy to go unconscious about what your work flow is really like. I wanted to be at least partly aware – with a chance of productivity.

Last week, I also promised to check in today about how it went and what I discovered.

How it went

The simple act of writing down the time when I switched activities was quite illuminating! After 5 days, I’m more mindful of what I’m doing moment to moment. Sometimes writing things down even helped me stop frittering and get back on task. That wasn’t the intention, but a nice side effect.

Between doing this process and writing the God List this week, I’ve felt really productive and gotten many more things accomplished than I normally do. It’s actually been a banner week – and even my mastermind buds are impressed!

What I discovered

• The cats and turtles are ADD nightmares. They interrupt me at least 3-4x/day. In fact, I’m typing one0handed right now with a kitten in my other arm. I love them, but they’re not productivity allies.
• I go on email, facebook or twitter to get info – and get sidetracked by other grabby things. “Oh, I’ll just check to see who emailed/tweeted/messaged me.” Riiight.
• I think I might over-edit my writing. I might even be a bit perfectionistic (if you are related to me, you’re not allowed to comment on this). ; )
• There are a couple of people I check in with during my day, just to say how I’m doing and find out how they are.
• Wrapping-up after meeting with a client takes longer than I thought.
• I do personal stuff during my work day (like send messages to old friends from high school).
• In 5 days, I worked 48.75 hours.
• I sometimes spend a lot of time/energy trying to force myself to work on something that isn’t flowing, but not actually get much done. Want an example?

The following is an example of me trying to edit a webpage when I really didn’t want to:

10:50  Start working on the web page
10:56  Check calendar
10:57  Snack
11:05  Twitter, read a blog
11:12  Back to working on web page
11:30 Twitter (Argh! Don’t want to work on that page!)
11:33  Back to web page
11:39  Facebook
11:41  Back to web page
12:05 Twitter
12:06  Facebook
12:08  Back to web page

Fortunately, I did actually complete it. You can see for yourself if you like:

In addition to productivity, the analysis yielded some interesting data on my use of Twitter and Facebook.

• In 5 days, I spent 271 minutes on Facebook and Twitter (roughly 54 minutes a day).
• Some-to-most of that time was business-related or networking time.
• On average, I go on Twitter 7 times a day and Facebook 5 times.
• My time on each site is usually 1-4 minutes – with rare 20-30 minute distraction marathons.
• I don’t usually go on either site before 11am (which happens to be my most productive time of day).
• I usually check Twitter before Facebook

The moral of the story

The goal here isn’t to judge what I’ve discovered. As I mentioned in the other post, the goal is simply to be curious – and notice if there are changes I want to make.

Same for you. : ) If you’d like to discover how much time you spend of social networking or what your most productive times of the day are, give this process a whirl. Be gentle with yourself about your discoveries.

Upcoming changes

Based on what I’ve observed so far, there are 3 things I’d like to tweak and see what happens:

1. Client appointments: Schedule a half-hour after each client appointment for wrapping up notes and transitioning.
2. Work hours: Keep the work day to 9 hours, including breaks, as I get less productive as the day wears on.
3. Stuckness: If I’m feeling stuck on a project – instead of twittering – I’ll try walking away from it for a little while, jumping around, or connecting with a bizbud to talk it out.

I’ll play with these for a while and see what happens. How about you? What’s your next step?

Thoughts? Yeah, buts? Me, toos?