Learning the gentle art of retreat
From your enthusiastic and heartfelt emails about the squirrel in my truck, I could tell that the topic touched a nerve. Apparently, I have a lot of overwhelmed readers who are in good company.
Simply put: you’re busy. You have a million commitments to your work, your family, your community, your inbox… not to mention the fact that you’re trying to keep it all balanced and maybe have a little fun from time to time.
So I wanted to make space in this Juicy Gems to share how to meet that need for retreat.
Resistance
Although you might think people would feel enthusiastic about taking a reprieve, most don’t. When they acknowledge how truly tired they feel, most people try to ignore it. It often feels overwhelming and even frightening to consider taking a break.
So instead of meeting that deep need, we make up reasons why we shouldn’t, can’t, don’t have time, don’t have money, etc. Indeed, there isn’t a lot of time or money to spare in most households today. You do have commitments and obligations to meet. But what’s the real cost to you?
What do you really gain in the long run by denying yourself the space and time you truly need?
At the heart of the matter
I believe that there nothing more important than nourishing your heart-spirit. Nothing. You weren’t born to be a slave to your work or your duties. You were born to live.
If you look in nature, you’ll see busy birds work at their nests, gathering food, raising young – and yet they also sit, fat and happy in a sunbeam, and sing for the sheer joy of it. Even our resident hummingbirds, the most active bird on the planet, sit in the tops of trees and just look around for whole minutes at a time.
Photo credit: Marc Langille – www.marclangille.com
If they can, can’t you?
It’s an inside job
The biggest challenge isn’t deciding what you’ll do with your retreat time. The biggest leap for most people (including me) is actually agreeing to do it. So, I’d like to offer 3 suggestions that might make that process easier.
- Set your intention
In a quiet moment, ask yourself: What kind of retreat do I really need?
And listen inside of you for messages from your heart. Images. Sensations. Just notice if anything comes up – and trust it.
If you feel the urge to squash the first things that come up, don’t. Be gentle with yourself.
Over a period of a few moments or even several days, allow yourself to dream up your idea of what a retreat might look like. Maybe it includes other people, or maybe not. Maybe it’s in your home, or away from it. Maybe it involves activity, or maybe doing nothing at all.
You get to decide. Dream a little.
- Create the space
Once you have a clear idea of what it is you want, then create the space in your life to have it.
About a month ago, I decided I needed a get-away-from-everything retreat at the end of this month. I haven’t done this in over 2 years and it felt like a huge leap.
- Commitments: In order to clear the space in my life, I spoke with and asked permission from more than a half-dozen people. Inspired Spouse, co-workers, business buddies, clients, etc. 10, to be exact. Some of them, multiple times. It was a little scary to be clear with them about how I needed their support and help, but asking them helped make space.
- Finances: I had to check my budget and make sure I could swing time off from work and spend money on my retreat. I was able to negotiate a discount on my accommodations. This made space in my finances.
- Calendar: I looked at my calendar again and again to make sure I hadn’t forgotten to close a loop or follow up on something. It took about a week to work out the details.
The good news? After all this clearing, I’ve made space for a whole week off next week. I’ll be completely unplugged. I’ll be spending 4 days at an abbey – a totally new experience for me. I can’t tell you how freeing this feels.
- Commit
Once you have an intention and you’ve made space to retreat, put it on your calendar (or however you remind yourself).
When possible conflicts arise beforehand, you may find yourself struggling to keep your time a priority. You may be expected to put others first, or work, or school. Practice holding the space open for yourself. It can be a stretch, but your heart-spirit is worth the effort.
Yo, Jen. What does this have to do with organizing?
A valid question. : )
The way I see it, when your heart and spirit are nourished, you can do anything you set your mind to. Work becomes easier. Creativity flows. Relationships blossom. Nourishing yourself makes everything possible… including having an inspired home office.
Everyone needs time to replenish. And if you’re still not convinced, think of how much more focused and relaxed you’ll feel when you return.
If you’re inclined, I’d love your positive thoughts and prayers while I’m on retreat next week.
What would be your idea of a truly soul-nourishing retreat?
