What your most neglected room can tell you

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Just about everyone has one part of the house where the unwanted curiosities go. Sometimes it’s a drawer or an unused room, sometimes it’s in the attic or basement. When I have an item I’m not sure I need anymore, it goes in the mudroom for the next trip to the garage.

Here’s a list of some of our most recent unwanted oddities:

• a large box from a computer part
• a stack of unloved books
• a huge laundry soap bucket
• several bags of sticky, empty soda cans
• our old mattress

I didn’t think about what I wanted to do with all these things when they went to the garage. I just know I don’t want them in the house — so out they went!

The outcome of deferring

Putting stuff in the garage (or other room) without thinking defers making the final decision. Deferred decisions have a very “ugh” feeling to them. No matter what room you put things in you can tell by how it feels.

Sometimes I go out in the garage and I just can’t bear to look around. It’s too overwhelming. If you can relate to this feeling, it’s normal. Your brain can only handle one thing a a time (no matter how well you multitask), and when there are innumerable things in your garage, it stops your brain in its tracks. Instant overwhelm.

Every time we defer deciding what to do with an object, we add to our feelings of overwhelm.

Wrestling with “more is more”

It’s normal to be overwhelmed, in part because of the world in which you live.

I used to live in a house built in the 1920s. I loved the Craftsman style and architecture – what I hated was the lack of storage. When we finished the basement, the first priority was adding closet space. Looking back, it makes me wonder what’s changed so much about lifestyles in 100 years that would warrant such a drastic need for storage. Many older houses just had a nail to hang a Sunday dress on! Are human beings so different today?

Humans haven’t changed in a century, but our culture’s priorities have. Most Westerners are caught up in the pursuit of the newest, the biggest, the latest trends – even though very little of it adds lasting satisfaction or peace to our lives. I think that marketing messages escalate our fears of being caught unprepared and being the odd-person-out. We collect stuff to feel safe.

The more we stuff we accumulate, the more time we spend managing it all. This effectively reduces the time we have for the relationships we crave.

Alternatives (they do exist!)

A variety of communities have sprung up around voluntary simplicity and the slow movement. Wise people are waking up to the idea that more/newer/better doesn’t fulfill our heart’s needs. These communities help people reclaim their lives and loves.

As I’ve been on my own path to slowing down and choosing simplicity, I am finding more time to self-nourish, to enjoy my partner and friends, and even reclaim a hobby or two. How 20th century!

While I don’t have anything to share in discussions about TV shows or the latest gadgets (I own neither), I would really rather hear about people’s hearts anyway. I’m slowly defining myself less by what I own, and more by who I am.

But what about the stuff in my garage?

Right. About that. Whether your stuff comes from your office, kitchen, or other room, everything makes its way to the garage in the end. And there it sits, accumulating. Waiting for you to decide its fate.

The dread of this project comes from deferring so many decisions into one place – especially if you have attachment or emotions toward any of the items that languish there.

My primary suggestion is to make peace with letting it go. You will inevitably let each thing go – either now or when you die. The question is: how long you want to live with that “ugh” energy?

If you’ve had enough, roll up your sleeves and try these 3 practical steps:

1. The journey of a thousand miles:
Start with one thing in your garage. One thing only. Pick it up and look at it. Make room for any feelings that come up for you around this item.

2. Find where it goes:
Be curious about where it goes next. Once you’ve decided, commit to letting it go even if you haven’t gotten all the possible use out of it. Even if you think you could/should make money from it. Let go.

Research appropriate homes for it, but acknowledge that it’s an alien to you now, not your possession. Once you know where it goes next (recycle, donate, disposal), take it there.

3. Rinse, repeat:
Keep doing these two steps until only the essential remain. It sounds so easy, most people ignore this advice as simplistic. It’s challenging, but very effective. Just start.

4 comments

Tracking Your List of To-Dos

Guest blogger,  Anne Forbes

From Lists to Circles

I am a list-maker. I especially excel when it comes to To-Do lists in a variety of forms. Lately, I’ve found that my linear lists are not serving me well. They need to be re-done every week or so, they aren’t flexible, they get messy, and they get buried under the current project on my desk.

I am also a Wheel-keeper. That means that I track the seasons and cycles of my life in tune with the natural world, using circular templates that I created called the Wheels of Time and Place, and I teach others to join me in the rewards of this practice. Recently, during an Office Spa Day with Jen, I experienced breakthrough:

Get those to-dos onto a circle!

A Wheel of To-Do’s for a Year

My inspiration for this idea comes from Marian, who has been keeping circular Wheel of the Year journals with me for a number of years. One of her innovations is to use her Wheel to create and track her To-Do list through the seasons. In her own words,

“I use a Wheel of the Year to track what’s happening with the sun, moon, and planets, as well as projects I would like to accomplish throughout the year. I write down each task on a sticky note, in a specific color for different categories. I move the sticky notes around as needed to adjust the timing. I remove a sticky note when I’ve accomplished a project, so by the end of the year there are only a few left. So instead of filling up, it’s like an emptying out, which is a very satisfying feeling!”

To-Do Lists for Shorter Time Frames

My self-appointed task during the Office Spa Day was to take my current linear to-do list and transfer it to a Wheel, which I post on the wall behind my desk. I found that looking at a whole year at once was too much, so I set it up for three months, leading up to the Summer Solstice.

I divided my To-Do Wheel into four categories, sized by their relative importance to me:

1. Creative-Growing Edges, the largest category
2. Current Teaching and Outreach
3. Business (marketing, ecommerce, book-keeping, etc.)
4. Stuff, the smallest and most miscellaneous category

By the end of Office Spa time, I had all of my items off of the linear list, onto sticky notes, and onto the Wheel. It was an amazing feeling! I selected an image for the center that reminds me to abide in a feeling of equanimity.

At the end of each day, I remove the tasks that I have completed and move tasks for the next day into the center of the Wheel. This is also a time that I often divide a large task into smaller ones.

To be sure that I am looking ahead, I add longer range plans as placeholders in their appropriate category. This helps me keep them in mind while streamlining the workflow before me in the moment.

The result – more joy in my work, more focus, and a feeling of integration – just what circles are best at doing!

Wise woman Anne Forbes failed her first attempt at retirement and instead created the Wheels of Time and Place, an attractive toolkit and set of practices for connecting to the natural world every day. The toolkit holds a set of circular journals that individuals, groups, or classrooms use as nature journals, storytelling journals, spiritual journals, or a combination. You can read more about her and her work at www.partnersinplace.com.

6 comments

During a recent class, we discussed how important it is to celebrate your accomplishments (big and small) before moving onto the next task. Celebration creates energy. A fun discussion about energy, fuel, cars and organizing ensued. I invited two of the participants, both named Sarah, to write about their perspective on the topic. Enjoy!

Part 1:

Sarah Tieck, guest blogger

My Toyota Corolla’s fuel gauge says there is a quarter tank of gas left. Noticing that, I added a stop at the gas station to my list of errands. Simple as that. There was no agonizing about if I should stop for gas or where. No cursing that I have to monitor my car’s fuel and maintenance needs. No weeping because my tank has gotten low. There is no question. I will stop and refuel — if I don’t, in time the car won’t work.

Lately I’ve been running on fumes. No, I don’t have a magical gauge, but I knew. All I needed to do was look around. There were pizza and take-out boxes in the garbage can, dishes in the sink, four timesheets where I’d logged into work well after my official start time, and a general feeling of being stuck with no clear steps forward on several projects.

As a creative person who has been steadily working and meeting deadlines, but rarely taking time to replenish and refuel after these journeys, my tank is low low low. And, I’m having to stop more often to refuel — sort of like those times when you only fill up partially at the gas station. In order to create, to do good work, and to savor my life, I’m having to learn how to fuel up. Interesting that the theme I’ve chosen for this year is nourish.

Celebration is a form of nourishment. Many people wait for completion to do this — and even then, barely stop to acknowledge what has been completed and put away supplies and papers. Little do we realize that little celebrations — nourishment — along the way are important fuel to keeping moving with big goals … sort of like fueling your car on a long trip.

To refuel by celebrating, you don’t need to do anything huge. You simply need to find a way to pause and take some time for an experience that will strengthen and energize you. That gives you ideas and images to draw from and fuel your work. It honors what you’ve done. Those important baby steps.

So, when you feel like you could keep going … stopping to play, to workout, to connect, to savor can all be forms of nourishment that will add  fuel to your tank. Things like workouts and fun offer a big boost for a goal — they create movement, energy, and excitement. And, that transfers. That candy bar and diet soda? As temporary as a jump for a dead battery.

Last week, I nourished a writing deadline with a bike ride and some geocaching with my husband. We played in the woods and the next day, I finished the book I was writing. When I take time to fill myself up like this — even when it seems counterintuitive — the things I want (and need) to do are easier! That weekend, I spent some time relaxing on the couch, saw Letters to Juliet, had an evening out with some friends who make me smile. You know what? Even though I rested and filled up first, the dishes and vacuuming and errands got done. And, that Monday morning, I returned to work with a tank full of fuel — as well as the fuel of my vision of what I want to create — to help me move forward.

Part 2:

Sarah DeWeerdt, Guest blogger

When Sarah likened needing to stop and replenish one’s energy to filling up the gas tank of a car, my immediate impulse was to wish I were a Prius. Imagine: speeding down the road in productive, virtuous near-silence, able to travel twice as far between fill-ups as all those other jalopies.

But the truth is, if I were a Prius, I’d just wish I were a hydrogen fuel cell vehicle. And if I were a hydrogen fuel cell vehicle, I’d wish I were…some kind of zero-emissions flying car thingy that hasn’t even been invented yet.

I’m hardly ever satisfied with the distance I’ve traveled. But maybe slowing down and refueling is actually part of the excitement. I mean, if I didn’t have to stop for a fill-up, I wouldn’t have the opportunity to notice the precise latitude where gas station convenience stores stop selling Dr. Pepper and start selling Mr. Pibb. I wouldn’t get to chuckle over those crazy souvenir snow globes filled with dinosaur teeth. I’d miss seeing, while paying for my gas, that family walk into the store straight from the pages of a Flannery O’Connor short story.

For me, this need to go faster and farther without stopping, ignoring the lurid red “E” on the dashboard, doesn’t just pose a problem when I’m trying to clear clutter and organize—it’s actually the source of my clutter. That is, there are so many interesting and amazing things in the world that I’m tempted to hold on to every interesting newspaper clipping, each scrap of vintage lace, out of the conviction that I’ll do something with it someday.

But I won’t. Because the body is a vehicle that craves rest, and one that can only travel so far. That’s been one of the most surprising and unsettling lessons of Jen’s class so far: confronting my clutter is, in effect, confronting my own mortality.

That epiphany isn’t a wholly gloomy one, though. With practice, I’m starting to recognize the difference between things that are merely interesting and things that make my brain light up with neurons firing in a thousand directions. (I swear it’s a literal scalp-tingling sensation.) I’m letting go of the former category so that I’ll have more attention for the latter. So that next time I pull off the highway into that gas station, I’ll be able to chuckle at that snow globe and leave it on the shelf, and fix the precise image of that Southern gothic family in my mind, because they are going to make one hell of a poem or painting later. Just you wait and see.

Sarah Tieck has authored more than 36 nonfiction books for children and teaches writing classes at the Loft Literary Center in Minneapolis. Her articles and essays appear regularly in home and garden magazines, lifestyle magazines, and major daily newspapers such as the Star Tribune and the Chicago Tribune. Contact her at her Web site, www.sarahtieck.com.

Sarah DeWeerdt is a freelance writer and editor in Seattle, Washington. Read her science writing via sarahdeweerdt.blogspot.com and her recipes at smalltastes.blogspot.com.

Can you relate? Share your thoughts in the comments section below!

9 comments

The “What do YOU do?” series gives you a glimpse into my life as a messy, creative person and invites you to share your organizing insights and ideas.

Online distractions.

Although the Web and email are all pretty handy tools, sometimes they’re so visually stimulating that they feel like threats. Enemies. Barriers to concentration.

If you want to focus, there are lots of ways to prevent distraction and still get the most from these tools.

Here’s what I do prevent online distraction

• Close browser tabs - Firefox and Internet Explorer (and I’m sure many other browsers) allow users to open an infinite number of tabs. I just know that if the little tab says Facebook, I will click on it whether I really want to go on Facebook or not. So I keep it (and other distracting websites) closed. In fact, I keep as few open as possible. Usually just my gmail and gcal are open.

• Prevent popups - Most of us know about pop-ups from websites. But I’m talking about the pop-ups that Skype creates every time one of my contacts gets online. And the pop-up on gmail when someone wants to instant message me. And the pop-up that appears when an email comes into your inbox.

Concentration is hard enough without pop-ups, so I’ve turned them all off. With Skype, I have to actually log off. With gmail, I have to select my status as “offline”. If you have Outlook, you can opt out of the “so-and-so has sent you a message” announcements. And good riddance!

Here’s what I’m working on

• Twitter and Tweetdeck – I’m not sure I’m actually working on this, but I’m aware that although I keep very few browser windows open, I almost always have TweetDeck (a tool that makes Twitter easier to use) open. I’m still figuring out if it’s a distraction or a tool – or both.

What do YOU do that minimizes online distractions?

Your turn! If you’d like, please share what you’re doing that helps you in your business and/or life – and also something that you’re working on/experimenting with.

Your comments on your own process are welcome. Just remember to give advice to me or others only when it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

6 comments

Lessons from markers, dogs, and the 3-letter word

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When it comes to creating order in your workspace, sometimes it’s the smallest changes that have the greatest positive impact on your work and well-being.

I discovered an assumption recently that I consider it “free time” when I don’t have a task or appointment scheduled on my calendar. I was frittering away perfectly good work time watching Ellen videos and reading Facebook – and then wondering why I wasn’t getting anything done. Yipes!

Three weeks ago, I started a new practice that is benefiting both my productivity and spirituality.

It has so revolutionized my focus, that I thought I’d share it with you in case you want to try it.

A disclaimer

Now, before you go thinking I’m a genius, I’ll tell you that someone else thought of this before I did. In Abraham-Hicks, they call it the ‘placemat technique’. What I’m doing is a variation on that theme… without the manifest-y stuff. And also with a different outcome. But it’s similar. Aaaanyway…

Big, colorful, and grape-scented

I needed some structure with my work flow.

Since I’m a tactile learner, I love to use huge pieces of paper and sweeping movements with my whole body to think and plan. I am also a raving fan of those fruit-scented magic markers. Mmm. Strawberry… Lime… Blueberry… Sorry, I digress.

Anyway, I like to use these tools and methods because they’re so natural and fun for me. So I decided to use them with the intention of focusing better when I have unscheduled work time.

Monday morning magic markers

At the beginning of the week, I reflect on what goals I want to move forward. I check my calendar to see how much free time I actually have to work on these projects.

Then, using 2′x3′ Post-It(c) flip chart paper, I create two columns. The first column says “Jen” – and I write down the things I’d really like to do in the next 5 days. This week, for example, it looks like this:

Jen:

• Plan steps for 4HS
• Meet with Marketing Director (me)
• Prep for smARTist event
• Plan to update December expenses/income
• Update pricing on website
• Write article for newsletter

I hang this colorful, fruity paper on the wall next to my desk. When I find myself getting distracted or confused about what I want to be doing, it’s right there. When I finish something, I use another marker and cross it off.

It’s amazing how something so simple can help me be so focused and productive.

What’s in the other column?

I mentioned that there are 2 columns. The second column says “God”. This is one of the most amazing, radical things I’ve ever done in my business. I’m delegating stuff to the Divine.

Now, maybe you’re thinking I’m being blasphemous or that all the recent retreats to the Abbey have made an impact on me. Maybe both are true.

But here’s the thing. Stuff happens every day that I cannot handle. I can’t handle it because I don’t understand it, or it frightens me, or I feel huge resistance to dealing with it. This happens for everyone. Every day. Conflict happens. Surprises happen. Things fall through.

All the stuff I cannot handle

At 3:45am, guess what I do? I wake up and start to worry about all of it. It sucks. Maybe you can relate.

Lately, I’ve started to realize that not a single bit of worrying I’ve ever done has ever changed a thing.

If anything, worry has made matters worse. “What if I don’t make enough money this month?” turns into awkward conversations with loved ones. “Do I have anything to wear tomorrow?” turns into a panicky morning and an uncomfortable day. “Is she mad at me?” et cetera – you know what I mean?

Worrying, no matter how skilled I am at it, is not helping me – or my business.

Drrrrrop it…

As a kid, I remember playing with a friend’s young golden retriever. “Sensi, drop it.” She had a tennis ball, but she wouldn’t obey. I didn’t yell, I just said it calmly, persistently, over and over, “Drrrrrop it, Sensi. Drrrrrop it. Drop. Sensi, drop it. Drrrrrrrop it.”

And some days, I think that’s exactly what God must be saying to me. “Drrrrrrop it, Jen. Drop. Jen, drrrrrop it. ”

My ego really, really wants to hang on to control and try to handle everything. Yet there’s a deeper place in me that wants to hand over the scary stuff and the confusing stuff and the hard stuff. And maybe pick it up later when I feel more ready.

So I started this practice of writing a God List every week, along with my own to-dos, to practice dropping it and actively handing it over.

This week, it looks like this:

God:

• bill paying system
• my week “off”
• hard drive backup
• too much to do

If it’s on this list, it means I have NO idea what to do about it and I’m not sure what my next step is. Because it’s on God’s list, I don’t have to worry. I delegated it. It’ll get dealt with.

I’ll bet you know what’s coming next, but I’m still amazed. After 3 weeks, everything I’ve delegated to God so far has gotten resolved. Inspired Spouse’s broken laptop. Feeling overwhelmed. Snarly budget stuff. I don’t know why it has worked out this way. In fact, I don’t need to know. It just has.

All from writing God a to-do list in watermelon-scented marker.

A word on names: If you wanted to try this yourself, it doesn’t really matter what your religious views are. Instead of a God List, you could write a to-do list for the Universe. Or the Divine. Or the Earth. Or Love. There are thousands of names for the Thing That is Bigger Than Us. I just picked one that works for me.

The lesson

Practice taking conscious ownership of the things you can handle – and purposely giving away the rest to Something Bigger. Scary? You bet. But it’s worth it. It’s clutter-clearing for the spirit.

Thoughts? Yeah, buts? Me toos?

40 comments

Finding a balance between push and release
Jennifer Hofmann, Inspired Home Office

In order to drive a nail into a board, there’s the obvious downswing that pushes in the nail. Equally important is the back swing in which you prepare for the next push.

If you’re driving a car, pressing the accelerator is only half of the “getting there” equation. You also have to decelerate at the appropriate time, or your car will be in a world of hurt.

To accomplish just about anything, what’s needed is a balance between push and release.

Like most of the creative people I know, I have a frustrating tendency to focus on the push. In fact, as I write this, I’m in the process of trying to convince myself that I don’t want release at all (even though I need it). Instead, I should actually be pushing harder. Frustrating.

Push is not a resting state

When you’re in a period of intense creating, you lose the ability to contrast it with your resting state. The creative state begins to feel like normal, the baseline, when it isn’t.

The trouble is, that pushing harder and forcing work out of ourselves turns off the creative flow. Inspiration goes from a gushing river to a trickle to a dry river bed.

Pausing is vital to the creative process. Taking a break, releasing the pressure, is what fills us back up again. Once we’re replenished, you can create again without struggle.

But it’s hard.

If you live in the States, you’re probably unaware of how much drive is a part of our culture. Productivity. Proving our worth. It’s a silent message, but ever-present and ingrained.

Because of this, slowing down to replenish is counter-culture. Pausing is like swimming against a powerful stream. I often find myself feeling guilty and apologizing for taking time to nourish my spirit. Sometimes I just ignore my need to stop because it’s so hard to claim it.

Lately, I’ve been on an earnest search to discover what replenishes me. Recently, I was surprised to find that I was trying to concoct an “inspiration pill” which would allow me to quickly find my center and begin working again.

It’s laughable, isn’t it? Hurry up and slow down! In truth, pausing takes as long as it needs to and, by nature, can’t be hurried.

What I do to find inspiration

Interestingly, the word “inspire” means to breathe in. So oxygen is a good start. I also like to breathe in quiet – whether that comes from actual silence or my noise-canceling headphones. Removing sound helps me hear the important messages that come from inside.

In my heart of hearts, the thing that nourishes me most is singing old hymns from my days as a music minister. It’s been years since I sang at Mass on Sundays, but I get out my guitar and a big binder of sheet music and play until my fingertips are throbbing.

Something about the lyrics reminds me that I’m just a tiny star in the human constellation… and this is a good thing. These hymns remind me that it’s God/Universe who’s making the stars turn, not me. That it’s safe to let go and trust. I don’t have to control everything (even though my ego wants to).

After a session like this, I have happy tears and a deep feeling of release. Suddenly there’s room in my life again for all the things I love. Things come back into balance again.

It took me a long time to figure out that this is what works for me. And it will probably take the rest of my life to find ways to not resist doing it. I’m okay with that. Like everything in life, it’s a process, not a destination.

What works for you? How do you pause and replenish?

4 comments

Making friends with the whims of concentration

Please enjoy this sample narration from my brain last week while I was attempting to work on an Important Thing:

Argh! The cat’s licking is driving me crazy!! I wonder what’s on Twitter? (opens Twitter and reads a few entries)

I need to do that THING! Argh! Quit farting around! (closes Twitter) Okay, now work. (attempts to start the THING)

I wonder why those bees are hanging around outside my window… (ponders) What’s in my email inbox? (checks) Wait – what was I doing – oh! The THING!

Argh!

Two hours later, the THING was not done.

When I was a kid, it was the same scenario except I was supposed to be cleaning my room. I’d get distracted by some fascinating thing (shell collection, old books, etc.) in the attempt and my mom would speak from another room, “I don’t hear any cleaning going on in there.”

It used to drive my mom batty. Now it drives ME batty. If I had an employer, I’d have someone to keep me on task (maybe). But, like many, I am self-employed and sometimes get hopelessly off-track and can’t get back on.

Traction or distraction?

If I had traction, I would be moving forward with the THING. But in the scenario above, I was completely distracted and unable to focus.

If you have ADD or just think you do, maybe you can relate. We all have days like this. In fact, one of my favorite authors, Ned Hallowell, theorizes that even those without ADD may have the same behaviors when trying to juggle too many things.

If you get distracted like this periodically, it’s pretty normal. But, since it’s hardly a desirable place to be in very long, you might be wondering what to do about it?

Moving toward traction

Bouts of distraction happen. That’s just how it is.

Everyone has different symptoms when they’re feeling distracted, but the outcome is usually the same: you’re busy, but your work’s not purposeful.

Since I really believe it’s your office’s job to support you, sometimes making small adjustments to your space can help you feel less distracted so you can focus better.

Notice

Small adjustments come from the little things you notice around you. Be curious for a moment about what’s distracting you. On the crazy day I described above the sun’s glare was bothering me. I noticed the cat’s repetitious grooming. I looked around me and saw multiple open project folders were vying for my attention.

All of the things you notice are great information.

Adjust accordingly

Once you realize what’s pulling you off-track, take a couple of minutes to manage your experience. Remove the attention-grabbers. Your sanity is worth it.

For myself, I closed the blinds to keep the glare out of my eyes, I moved the cat off my lap, I put a project away that was messing up my desk, and closed the other blinds because the sun moved (well, technically, the earth moved).

Anyway, managing my experience helped me concentrate enough to start the THING.

Except when that doesn’t work

I tried to start the THING and got distracted. Again.

And then I humbly realized: I can’t bend focus to my will. Concentration can only be managed. Even in the clearest, most refreshing spaces sometimes people still can’t concentrate.

When focus is an Inside Job

When adjusting your external space doesn’t work, it’s time to look inside yourself and find out what is really happening. It’s what I call an Inside Job.

If your brain is zipping along at breakneck speed – while you’re compulsively checking email, Facebook, Twitter, and photos of your dogs all at the same time – it’s a symptom.

Sometimes you need a break. Or a glass of water. Or a 2-week vacation. No matter which way you slice it, your brain needs to be allowed to run free.

A desk can drag you down

Once upon a time, people moved around. They walked places, moved their bodies for work, rode animals, collected their own food. Frankly, it wasn’t that long ago.

Today, I know a lot of people who, for work, sit at desks for a large portion of the day. Me, for one. Now, that’s not such a bad thing. If not for the internet, Inspired Home Office wouldn’t exist.

But for many people that natural, vital movement is gone.

What to do about it

That compulsive internet checking is an attempt to meet the need for movement, except that it doesn’t work very well.

If you beat yourself up because you can’t concentrate, take a fresh look at what’s happening.

Robert Fritz, another of my very favorite authors, believes that taking breaks is vital to creativity. Who hasn’t gotten a good idea in the shower? Or out walking?

If you’re not productive and feeling antsy, move. That’s right. Get on up and get away from your desk. Do something you like. You’ll be surprised what good it’ll do you – and how much better you’ll concentrate when you get back.

10 comments

Have you ever had “one of those days?” Or a whole week of them?

“How are you, today?”
“Oh, fine.”

Even though you don’t feel fine.

It takes a lot of energy to put on a plastic smile. I mean a lot. In fact, forcing emotions can make you feel drained of energy in the long run.

What’s really happening?

For any variety of interesting reasons, we deem true emotions unfit for public consumption. Somehow we adopted the belief that it’s not okay to be crabby. Or to feel off-balance. Or let it show.

If you keep your feelings isolated inside, you can feel very isolated.

(Bear with me and we’ll tie this into office organization in a minute. Honest.)

“Problem Identification”

In my opinion, “venting” gets a bad rap. Venting – as in: getting stuff of your chest. So instead, I started calling it “Problem Identification”. Makes it sound fancy and productive, doesn’t it?

Actually, it is productive.

If you give yourself permission to share what’s happening inside you, amazing things can happen. Just yesterday, I “Identified a Problem” that has been a source of frustration for weeks.

Okay. It was more than a “source of frustration.” I was a ball of nerves. I felt stressed, anxious, confused, ticked off, and I was taking everything (even unrelated things) 100% personally. You ever have one of those days? It sucks.

The productive part

Well. Yesterday, I got tired of stewing. I wrote a Problem Identification email to my two mastermind buddies and just let ‘er rip. What I was confused about. What I was angry about. What was frustrating me. (It’s not you, honest.)

By the time I wrote this bullet-pointed missive, I was already feeling better. I got it all off my chest. And their empathic replies started me grinning.

Lisa’s email said:

…sometimes it’s just fine to just be a big, angry, stompy-booted, annoyed person about it.

Isn’t she awesome? Then she said,

Letting yourself have that is self-care too.

Suddenly the mountain was a rightful molehill again.

How Problem Identification works

Want to get stompy-booted and unstuck, too?

1. Acknowledge that all is not right.
2. Ask someone you trust if they’re willing to listen without trying to “fix” you (important!).
3. Share the whole ugly mess of thoughts and feelings.

Problem Identification is only half the solution.

You’ve probably met people who only focus on the Identification part. They wear you down, don’t they? If you stop at Problem Identification, you just keep stewing in your own juices.

What’s needed next are Solutions.

In science, a “solution” involves mixing dense matter into less dense matter which dilutes its potency. A nerdy analogy, yes, but Problem Identification is a dense thing that you can mix into your spacious, not-dense curiosity. And the problem dissolves.

For example, once you’ve had a good vent, you can explore:

What is one small baby step I can take to move this forward?

What is one small shift that will move me from “stuck and irritated” into “clear and empowered?”

But only after you’ve had The Vent.

What the heck does this have to do with organizing?

I love it when you ask that.

Have you ever noticed that you get irritated and frustrated by your work space from time to time (or all the time?).

If you share this frustration with someone, it helps you move out of the mental snarl of negative self-talk. It helps you get clear about Exactly What Isn’t Working and how gol-blasted irritating it is.

Suddenly, there’s space in you to be curious about Solutions.  And you can move forward.

How cool is that?

You’re your own organizing expert

No one knows what you need better than you do (not even me!).

So inquire:

What’s bugging you about your office lately? Let it all out to someone you trust. Then cultivate curiosity about what you need and how you want to move forward.

Oh – and let me know how it goes!

Care to comment?

It started with a little blog entry I wrote a few weeks ago. A reader asked me how to keep her organizing momentum going – and stay organized once and for all.

“Ahhh, grasshoppah,” I replied. Organizing is like the seasons – there are messy phases and neat phases. Fruitful creative times and replenishment phases. Unrelenting productivity is unrealistic.

I started realizing that it’s really hard to get excited about organizing your office if you’re dog tired, burned out, and snarky. And I took this to heart and made the following three discoveries:

Replenishment must come first.

The belief that soul-sustaining activities are optional is a blind spot for many people – and a painful one. Take a moment and ask yourself – what have I been putting off that I deeply need?

A participant in my Inspired Organizing class had a huge epiphany last week when she realized that painting isn’t optional for her. Painting is the breath of her life – and nothing is more fulfilling than creating beauty with her canvas and paints.

And yet, she put it on hold. For long stretches of time.

Does this sound familiar? You, me – we all think that we can only do the thing that deeply nourishes us once (and only after) we get our “have-tos” done.

Soul-sustaining activity gives you the courage and energy to do what you think you cannot.

If you start with an empty watering can, what do you have to offer the garden? If you wake each morning with a dreaded to-do list, how will you find the way internal resources to complete it all? And if you force your way through day after day, how do you feel?

Doing activities that nourish you – on a regular basis – isn’t self indulgent. It’s a critical component of a healthy life. And no one can grant permission for this but you.

Putting your soul first means you can to take on your latest project renewed and recharged. It means that you can conquer things that plague you with energy and courage. Your Interactions with people you care about are warmer and more real. This self-knowledge can change your life.

Listen for what you already know.

Listening to – and trusting – what your heart needs is the best way to replenish your soul on a day to day, moment to moment basis. The answers you need are already inside you, waiting.

When my buddy Linda said she could meet me for lunch, but I’d have to wait an additional hour before we could meet up, I could feel my chest tighten with stress.

But then I asked myself what the most nourishing choice would be. I listened to my heart instead of my fear… and chose to meet her for a delightful late lunch. Not surprisingly, it was exactly what I needed. I left feeling seen, loved, and replenished.

In other words…

Organizing is a process that takes time. Caring for yourself along the way means that you will be able to sustain your resolve until it’s really working for you.

Now. What have you been waiting to do that will fill you up?

Care to comment?

A good friend from Ireland visited last week, so I decided in advance to take time off from work to fully enjoy her stay. It seemed like a really good idea.

The week before her arrival, I worked my tail off. It seemed like a stunningly good idea to put in 14 hour days to complete everything I’d normally do during the time she was here.

In the words of my Irish friend, “It was mad.”

Been there, too?

Maybe you’ve noticed this: you’re under a time crunch and expecting yourself to be ultra productive. But what actually happens is you fritter away time doing busywork and don’t complete the important tasks.

Personally, I got so frantic about everything I just had to do, I barely got it all done before my friend arrived.

Everything is an opportunity for transformation

The good news is that I practice what I preach: having an inspired home office is an evolution, not a revolution. When something doesn’t work or negative feelings pile up, it’s an incredible opportunity to learn.

Here’s what I realized.

You can’t manufacture yourself

Ever since industrialization, work has been defined as a linear process. Raw materials in, marketable product out. In our culture, we tend to work linearly, too.

But what happens when you are the product and your brain generates the raw material? You can’t hire three shifts, pay minimum wage, and keep the shop open 24/7.

When you’re the product, this linear thinking can do damage to your one-person show. Effort yourself into too much “productivity” and you’ll get exhausted sooner or later – even doing work you love.

The alternative: Working sustainably

It’s more sustainable and more enjoyable to think and work in terms of seasons. A particular project can show you the bountiful harvest of autumn and a contemplative winter. You plant the seeds of spring and burst into blooms of ideas in summer.

Chances are good that you’re in many places and seasons at once… and they’re all good. You might even check in right now and ask: what season are you in with your marketing? Or product development? Or your network and strategic alliances?

But what about your goals?

Does this seasonal, energetic flux mean you can’t have goals to work toward? Of course not. Goals keep you on track – but they don’t have to be shackles.

If you want to encourage sustainable productivity in your business, try these three guidelines for goals:

Things to try

1. Cultivate focus.

Ask yourself two questions to hone your focus:

What do I want?
When do I want it by?

These questions can be about anything: profit, marketing, projects, etc. You can write your answers longhand or make a bullet pointed list – whatever you need to take a good look at them.

2. Establish priorities.

Once your list is written and you’ve identified what you want – by when, ask one more question:

What is most important right now?

If you have several projects running at once, one might bring you the greatest profit, another is something you promised to a client, and a third could include regular maintenance of files. All of these are important; you decide which outranks the other.

When you’re clear about what trumps what, decisions become easier. Look at your list again and determine what you’ll do first and next and next after that.

3. Set boundaries.

Last, and arguably most important, is deciding when it’s time to not produce work. The last 2 questions:

When will I stop?
What do I need to care for my body, mind, and spirit?

A list of goals or to-dos won’t become your master if you’re clear about what kind of rest you need. Once you’ve established boundaries for yourself, honor them. Stopping allows you to rest and recharge, so you can work again renewed.

Summing up

You can use these three steps when work is calm, but especially when your workload is overwhelming or “mad.” You’ll be able to see through the busy-ness and work more effectively on your business.

Care to comment?