I still have 2 cards to go, but I just had to share the success! I’ve been writing about my credit card debt for a while now and it’s thrilling to have this accomplishment under my belt.

Other things I’ve done lately to get the other 2 moving forward:

• Transferred a high APR balance to a lower APR card.
• Set a goal for how much I pay each month for all the cards and stick to it.
• Pay off more than my goal when possible.

I’ve also discovered an inspiring blog called Get Rich Slowly, which applies Slow Movement concepts to personal finance. The blog is full of common sense advice with a dose of humor and zen. If you’re struggling with debt and cash flow, I highly recommend it.

At this point, I have 2 years, 8 months left to go before I’m done with credit card debt for good. It’s slow progress, but boy does it feel good!

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I want to thank everyone who commented on the first part of this series. Although I’m sad to know I’m not alone (because of what that means for you), I am happy to know that so many of us are working our way through and out of debt.

An update and tepid celebration

Last month, I owed $30,702. This month, my debt total is $30,162.

And I can feel a big, old depressing sigh escape from me as I type that. Yes, you might cajole me into celebrating the over $600 I made in payments, but… wow. I do want to celebrate that I paid more than minimum balances on all my payments. That felt really good.

I tell you, though, I’m gonna party next month when I get down into the 20′s. Maybe I’ll even give a prize away here or something fun.

So, start practicing your happy wiggle dance. We gonna party like it’s 1999.

Where I’m going with all this

If you own the Wish Kit, you know that the best place to start is at the end. The beginning is too hard and depressing and frustrating. But the end? Ahhh. That’s where all the inspiration and sunshine and roses are.

So, if I were to dream a little, here’s where I envision myself at the end of this process:

• honoring the commitment I made to my parents
• freedom from debt
• depositing all $700 monthly (that’s been going to the credit card companies) into savings or retirement
• (dare I say it) surprising Inspired Spouse with a trip to Hawaii

This seems awesome. However, it’s funny how hard it is to write this description of my future life. I’ve been so identified with having debt, that it’s challenging to imagine my life without it. Just the same, as I wrote this, I could feel my shoulders loosen and my breathing become easy. I felt lighter.

I’m going to keep sitting with that vision and see what else bubbles up. I’ll check in again next month with an update and another insight into the process of becoming debt-free.

Imagine…

What would your life be like without debt?

I welcome your comments on your own financial or debt situation. I also request kindly, firmly, that you not give advice to me or others unless it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

So. Dreams. Hopes. Visions. What thoughts come up for you as you read this post?

How I got into debt in the first place

I’ve just typed this title and now I’m staring at it. Thinking hard.

How did I get here, anyway?

In all likelihood, I got here by spending a little here and a little there. A few extravagant dinners a year didn’t seem like much. A vacation there – well, I deserved a break. I quit my job and started a business. Twice. My car needed repair. I bought groceries, heating oil and gasoline.

I didn’t wake up one day and say, “You know, I feel like spending 30,702 bucks! Charge!”

Debt arrived in dribs and drabs.

In truth, I feel a lot of shame about this debt. When I feel ashamed, I want to make excuses to explain my behavior. But explaining also leaves me feeling like a victim of my own choices. Which is crazy because I made them. I signed the receipts. I just didn’t realize how many.

So out of this mental pickle came a realization: I’ve spent unconsciously.

Two things I’m doing about debt

Back in elementary school gym class, we had these colorful, sturdy cups with a looped string attached. You’d stand precariously on top, a cup under each foot,  and hold the string while attempting to clomp forward. Remember those?

Getting out of debt, for me, has felt like walking on those cups. I’ve been taking one awkward, clompy step at a time.

Step one is compassion and forgiveness.

I have such a hard time with this. I mean, I know it’s good for me to be kind and compassionate with myself. I talk about this all the time. But it’s hard.

If I’m so not happy about the debt, it makes some sick kind of sense that I should be mean and judgmental with myself about it. That somehow this would help. But it doesn’t. I can learn from my choices without being hurtful to my spirit.

So, whenever I pay a bill, I take a deep breath and say, “You made a choice. You have a plan.” And I breathe some kindness toward myself. Clomp clomp.

Step two is honesty.

Mind you, I’m no financial expert. And I don’t play one on television. So my process for getting honest with myself comes from my own research and a stalwart desire to get the heck out of debt – not a degree in finance.

I started with a debt summary. That’s a fancy way of saying: “I wrote down all my loans and all my credit card balances.” Last month, I added them all up and got $30,702.

(Can you feel yourself reacting to that number?)

Maybe you’ve got more debt than that. Maybe less. But discovering the actual number was powerful for me. I was being honest with myself.

It was a clompy, awkward step. And stressful – so I gave myself some compassion.

And even though I’m wobbly, I’m finding my balance

As I’ve been alternating between compassion and honesty over the last 6 months, I’ve managed to shave off about $1500 from the total debt. And – WOO! – that feels good.

Feeling some control over the situation finally came from cultivating a few effective, soul-nourishing systems.

Granted, the total still feels to staggering to me, but like I tell my clients, “When you change any part of a system, the whole structure changes.” Even the tiniest action begins a snowball of progress that grows larger over time.

Holding the space

I’m taking other steps that I’ll reveal in other posts, but I want to stop here in case you want some room to digest this topic. We like to take small steps around here. Or try.

My plan is to check back in next month and let you know how it’s coming along, celebrate my successes, and share the journey. Would you like to, too?

I welcome your comments on your own financial or debt situation. I also request kindly, firmly, that you not give advice to me or others unless it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

So. Debt. Small business. Honesty and compassion. What thoughts and ideas come up for you as you read this post?