How thinking gets you into trouble – and gets you out of it, too.

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Sometimes it’s not the clutter.

Sometimes it’s what we think that causes the most trouble.

Imagine sitting down at your computer to check your email and, when you open the inbox, the number total unopened emails is in the 4-digits.

You look at that number glowing on your screen and quietly think to yourelf,

“I’m so behind. I’m never going to catch up.”

That little comment to yourself is so quiet that you hardly even notice it. Even if you do, it’s so quick, it barely registers before you’re on to the next thing.

Looking deeper

The effect that thought has on you is immense. Deep in your brain, that thought triggers a response to a threat. Your body begins to prepare for battle or flight – skin begins to sweat, heart rate increases, adrenaline is released to give you the power to run.

Most of the time, you have no idea it’s even happening. Your brain is on auto-pilot.

The problem is that you can’t put this response to good use. You can’t punch your inbox’s lights out. And, faced with 1000 emails, you probably won’t take flight and run screaming down the hall. All the body triggers are out of alignment with the actual stimulus.

Overload

Worst of all, if you’re like a lot of stressed-out, busy people, you’re constantly thinking these kinds of thoughts:

I’m so behind.
I should have this done by now.
I promised I’d have this back to her.
My client is showing up any minute.
I’m never going to get caught up.
I’ll never break through.
I forgot that AGAIN!?
I should be doing way more than I am.

Say these kinds of things to yourself enough times and you’ll feel like you’re always running and always fighting for some peace.

Case in point

If you’ve ever had the illusion that Jen Hofmann has it all figured out, think again. A couple of months ago I started having heart fluttering and chest pain – accompanied by pretty awful digestive problems. I had no idea what was going on and I was really scared.

Interestingly, right before the symptoms started, I had been thinking about how January was (in my mind) “a wash” and I kept telling myself, “I wasted a whole month. I should have been doing more to grow my business.”

I was talking myself into a mental frenzy – for what? January was fine.

When the symptoms started, I failed to see what a compassionate physician did: I was stressed to the point of anxiety. All because of my thoughts.

Stress isn’t a baseline state

When it comes to surviving en encounter with an angry mastodon, stress is a lifesaver. But when your opponent is your inbox or your kitchen counter or the vacuum cleaner, that level of stress is out of alignment. We all do it, but it really does us harm. Ask any cardiac expert.

Thoughts are an inside job

Lots of people jump to the conclusion that if the inbox is causing you stress, the solution is to clean it out. I say, woah there. Not so fast.

Instead, I invite you on a journey of far greater subtlety:

1. Practice noticing your thoughts.

Like a lot of people, if you can’t see something, it doesn’t exist. Inspired Spouse suggested yesterday that I start keeping a list of the thoughts that come up for me. What a fabulous idea. I’m keeping a running list for the next week, just to see what’s there.

Neutrally observing your beliefs is freeing in a way that a desperately clean desk isn’t.

2. See your thoughts as visitors, not guests.

Instead of opening the door and willy-nilly letting in any thought, ask yourself if you want what they’re selling.

Just because a Girl Scout rings the bell, doesn’t mean she can move into the guest room. Just because you think you’re behind, doesn’t mean that belief needs to move in and run your life.

When you start seeing your thoughts as visitors, you’re actively loosening the hold they have on your spirit – not to mention your autonomic nervous system. You get to decide what stays and what goes – which is empowering.

3. Gently start sending your thoughts away.

In other words, when you notice a thought, don’t cause more damage by telling yourself, “Dummy! Why are you thinking that again?”

Be gentle.

Notice if there are thoughts you want to release because they’re not really true. If you’re feeling behind, behind compared to what? What if it were okay to be exactly where you are right now, even if it’s not where you wanted to be?

The key is to begin to cultivate gentleness toward yourself.

The thoughts inside your head are sometimes harsh and cruel – and you can’t thrive in an environment like that. When you put your spirit in front of the line, the thoughts may still come up but they won’t run your life. It might be a long journey to get to that place, but just think of the possibilities.

Thoughts? Yeah, buts? Me toos?

9 comments

The “What do YOU do?” series gives you a glimpse into my life as a messy, creative person and invites you to share your organizing insights and ideas.

Names.

I dread those grocery-store moments. We’ve already locked eyes. A greeting is imminent. And my heart starts to thud because I have no idea what the person’s name is.

Having lived in Salem for 12 years and having held numerous jobs in which I met hundreds of new people every year, forgetting names and personal details is bound to happen. I feel added pressure, however, because some of those people are past clients who’ve hired me at Inspired Home Office.

At an inauguration party last year, I ran into a wonderful woman I recognized (and good thing – as I had worked with her in her home for several months), I just couldn’t remember her name. In fact, twice that night, I introduced her to others by the wrong name – and didn’t realize it until I’d gotten home later. Oh, the embarassment.

You can see why I go to such lengths to avoid the pain of making such a personal mistake. Most of us do!

Here’s what I do remember names

• Rely on synesthetic information - I have a fun and crazy brain thing called synesthesia – in which I perceive all the letters of the alphabet to have a color. In other words, the letter “j”, to me is pink. If a person’s name starts with the letter “m”, usually the whole name is also blue. Inspired Spouse thinks this is a neato-fun party trick. Synesthesia is pretty handy for remembering names because I remember the color better than the name. Odd. But fun.
• Repetition - When I meet people, especially if it’s someone I’m likely to meet again, I ask them to repeat their name for me. I ask how they spell their name. I say it again if possible during our conversation. At gatherings, I’ll go around the room and (to myself) say each person’s name. My test is to see how many people I can say goodbye to by name.

• Writing it down - At meetings, I’ll draw a little seating chart and write the names of everyone present as they introduce themselves. Even if I already know them well – sometimes I totally blank. I ask for business cards and write details on the back to help me remember more about them. When I teach in-person classes, I use name tags or table tents so their name is visible.
• Stories - People love to talk about themselves and I’m genuinely curious. So if a person has an interesting name – and we have a little time to talk – I ask them to tell me the story of their name. Not only do I learn something often personal and tender about them, but this also gives me repetition, synesthetic info, and a story – which is a lot more to go on if I ever meet them in the grocery store.

Here’s what I’m working on

• Recovery – If I draw a total blank on a name, I will usually default to my smiling, open self, apologize, and ask for a refresher. I sometimes ask for details about how we know each other. Usually, once I have enough context, I remember lots of things about the person. I just have to be patient with myself while I’m catching up.

• Forgiveness - When I thought up this post, I thought it would be cute and fun, but I’m realizing that I have a lot of shame (and evidently high expectations of myself) that I don’t remember names easily. Being gentle with myself is probably the hardest thing of all, but I’m getting there. I’m human. We all are.

What do YOU do that helps you remember names?

Your turn! If you’d like, please share what you’re doing that helps you remember names – and also something that you’re working on/experimenting with.

Your comments on your own process are welcome. Just remember to give advice to me or others only when it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

9 comments

The “What do YOU do?” series gives you a glimpse into my life as a messy, creative person and invites you to share your organizing insights and ideas.

Online distractions.

Although the Web and email are all pretty handy tools, sometimes they’re so visually stimulating that they feel like threats. Enemies. Barriers to concentration.

If you want to focus, there are lots of ways to prevent distraction and still get the most from these tools.

Here’s what I do prevent online distraction

• Close browser tabs - Firefox and Internet Explorer (and I’m sure many other browsers) allow users to open an infinite number of tabs. I just know that if the little tab says Facebook, I will click on it whether I really want to go on Facebook or not. So I keep it (and other distracting websites) closed. In fact, I keep as few open as possible. Usually just my gmail and gcal are open.

• Prevent popups - Most of us know about pop-ups from websites. But I’m talking about the pop-ups that Skype creates every time one of my contacts gets online. And the pop-up on gmail when someone wants to instant message me. And the pop-up that appears when an email comes into your inbox.

Concentration is hard enough without pop-ups, so I’ve turned them all off. With Skype, I have to actually log off. With gmail, I have to select my status as “offline”. If you have Outlook, you can opt out of the “so-and-so has sent you a message” announcements. And good riddance!

Here’s what I’m working on

• Twitter and Tweetdeck – I’m not sure I’m actually working on this, but I’m aware that although I keep very few browser windows open, I almost always have TweetDeck (a tool that makes Twitter easier to use) open. I’m still figuring out if it’s a distraction or a tool – or both.

What do YOU do that minimizes online distractions?

Your turn! If you’d like, please share what you’re doing that helps you in your business and/or life – and also something that you’re working on/experimenting with.

Your comments on your own process are welcome. Just remember to give advice to me or others only when it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

5 comments

Last week on the blog, I mentioned that I’m doing a time analysis for my work.

Before you think I’m obsessed with dry, boring organizy stuff, think about it. When you work alone, it’s easy to go unconscious about what your work flow is really like. I wanted to be at least partly aware – with a chance of productivity.

Last week, I also promised to check in today about how it went and what I discovered.

How it went

The simple act of writing down the time when I switched activities was quite illuminating! After 5 days, I’m more mindful of what I’m doing moment to moment. Sometimes writing things down even helped me stop frittering and get back on task. That wasn’t the intention, but a nice side effect.

Between doing this process and writing the God List this week, I’ve felt really productive and gotten many more things accomplished than I normally do. It’s actually been a banner week – and even my mastermind buds are impressed!

What I discovered

• The cats and turtles are ADD nightmares. They interrupt me at least 3-4x/day. In fact, I’m typing one0handed right now with a kitten in my other arm. I love them, but they’re not productivity allies.
• I go on email, facebook or twitter to get info – and get sidetracked by other grabby things. “Oh, I’ll just check to see who emailed/tweeted/messaged me.” Riiight.
• I think I might over-edit my writing. I might even be a bit perfectionistic (if you are related to me, you’re not allowed to comment on this). ; )
• There are a couple of people I check in with during my day, just to say how I’m doing and find out how they are.
• Wrapping-up after meeting with a client takes longer than I thought.
• I do personal stuff during my work day (like send messages to old friends from high school).
• In 5 days, I worked 48.75 hours.
• I sometimes spend a lot of time/energy trying to force myself to work on something that isn’t flowing, but not actually get much done. Want an example?

The following is an example of me trying to edit a webpage when I really didn’t want to:

10:50  Start working on the web page
10:56  Check calendar
10:57  Snack
11:05  Twitter, read a blog
11:12  Back to working on web page
11:30 Twitter (Argh! Don’t want to work on that page!)
11:33  Back to web page
11:39  Facebook
11:41  Back to web page
12:05 Twitter
12:06  Facebook
12:08  Back to web page

Fortunately, I did actually complete it. You can see for yourself if you like:

In addition to productivity, the analysis yielded some interesting data on my use of Twitter and Facebook.

• In 5 days, I spent 271 minutes on Facebook and Twitter (roughly 54 minutes a day).
• Some-to-most of that time was business-related or networking time.
• On average, I go on Twitter 7 times a day and Facebook 5 times.
• My time on each site is usually 1-4 minutes – with rare 20-30 minute distraction marathons.
• I don’t usually go on either site before 11am (which happens to be my most productive time of day).
• I usually check Twitter before Facebook

The moral of the story

The goal here isn’t to judge what I’ve discovered. As I mentioned in the other post, the goal is simply to be curious – and notice if there are changes I want to make.

Same for you. : ) If you’d like to discover how much time you spend of social networking or what your most productive times of the day are, give this process a whirl. Be gentle with yourself about your discoveries.

Upcoming changes

Based on what I’ve observed so far, there are 3 things I’d like to tweak and see what happens:

1. Client appointments: Schedule a half-hour after each client appointment for wrapping up notes and transitioning.
2. Work hours: Keep the work day to 9 hours, including breaks, as I get less productive as the day wears on.
3. Stuckness: If I’m feeling stuck on a project – instead of twittering – I’ll try walking away from it for a little while, jumping around, or connecting with a bizbud to talk it out.

I’ll play with these for a while and see what happens. How about you? What’s your next step?

Thoughts? Yeah, buts? Me, toos?

9 comments

Lessons from markers, dogs, and the 3-letter word

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When it comes to creating order in your workspace, sometimes it’s the smallest changes that have the greatest positive impact on your work and well-being.

I discovered an assumption recently that I consider it “free time” when I don’t have a task or appointment scheduled on my calendar. I was frittering away perfectly good work time watching Ellen videos and reading Facebook – and then wondering why I wasn’t getting anything done. Yipes!

Three weeks ago, I started a new practice that is benefiting both my productivity and spirituality.

It has so revolutionized my focus, that I thought I’d share it with you in case you want to try it.

A disclaimer

Now, before you go thinking I’m a genius, I’ll tell you that someone else thought of this before I did. In Abraham-Hicks, they call it the ‘placemat technique’. What I’m doing is a variation on that theme… without the manifest-y stuff. And also with a different outcome. But it’s similar. Aaaanyway…

Big, colorful, and grape-scented

I needed some structure with my work flow.

Since I’m a tactile learner, I love to use huge pieces of paper and sweeping movements with my whole body to think and plan. I am also a raving fan of those fruit-scented magic markers. Mmm. Strawberry… Lime… Blueberry… Sorry, I digress.

Anyway, I like to use these tools and methods because they’re so natural and fun for me. So I decided to use them with the intention of focusing better when I have unscheduled work time.

Monday morning magic markers

At the beginning of the week, I reflect on what goals I want to move forward. I check my calendar to see how much free time I actually have to work on these projects.

Then, using 2′x3′ Post-It(c) flip chart paper, I create two columns. The first column says “Jen” – and I write down the things I’d really like to do in the next 5 days. This week, for example, it looks like this:

Jen:

• Plan steps for 4HS
• Meet with Marketing Director (me)
• Prep for smARTist event
• Plan to update December expenses/income
• Update pricing on website
• Write article for newsletter

I hang this colorful, fruity paper on the wall next to my desk. When I find myself getting distracted or confused about what I want to be doing, it’s right there. When I finish something, I use another marker and cross it off.

It’s amazing how something so simple can help me be so focused and productive.

What’s in the other column?

I mentioned that there are 2 columns. The second column says “God”. This is one of the most amazing, radical things I’ve ever done in my business. I’m delegating stuff to the Divine.

Now, maybe you’re thinking I’m being blasphemous or that all the recent retreats to the Abbey have made an impact on me. Maybe both are true.

But here’s the thing. Stuff happens every day that I cannot handle. I can’t handle it because I don’t understand it, or it frightens me, or I feel huge resistance to dealing with it. This happens for everyone. Every day. Conflict happens. Surprises happen. Things fall through.

All the stuff I cannot handle

At 3:45am, guess what I do? I wake up and start to worry about all of it. It sucks. Maybe you can relate.

Lately, I’ve started to realize that not a single bit of worrying I’ve ever done has ever changed a thing.

If anything, worry has made matters worse. “What if I don’t make enough money this month?” turns into awkward conversations with loved ones. “Do I have anything to wear tomorrow?” turns into a panicky morning and an uncomfortable day. “Is she mad at me?” et cetera – you know what I mean?

Worrying, no matter how skilled I am at it, is not helping me – or my business.

Drrrrrop it…

As a kid, I remember playing with a friend’s young golden retriever. “Sensi, drop it.” She had a tennis ball, but she wouldn’t obey. I didn’t yell, I just said it calmly, persistently, over and over, “Drrrrrop it, Sensi. Drrrrrop it. Drop. Sensi, drop it. Drrrrrrrop it.”

And some days, I think that’s exactly what God must be saying to me. “Drrrrrrop it, Jen. Drop. Jen, drrrrrop it. ”

My ego really, really wants to hang on to control and try to handle everything. Yet there’s a deeper place in me that wants to hand over the scary stuff and the confusing stuff and the hard stuff. And maybe pick it up later when I feel more ready.

So I started this practice of writing a God List every week, along with my own to-dos, to practice dropping it and actively handing it over.

This week, it looks like this:

God:

• bill paying system
• my week “off”
• hard drive backup
• too much to do

If it’s on this list, it means I have NO idea what to do about it and I’m not sure what my next step is. Because it’s on God’s list, I don’t have to worry. I delegated it. It’ll get dealt with.

I’ll bet you know what’s coming next, but I’m still amazed. After 3 weeks, everything I’ve delegated to God so far has gotten resolved. Inspired Spouse’s broken laptop. Feeling overwhelmed. Snarly budget stuff. I don’t know why it has worked out this way. In fact, I don’t need to know. It just has.

All from writing God a to-do list in watermelon-scented marker.

A word on names: If you wanted to try this yourself, it doesn’t really matter what your religious views are. Instead of a God List, you could write a to-do list for the Universe. Or the Divine. Or the Earth. Or Love. There are thousands of names for the Thing That is Bigger Than Us. I just picked one that works for me.

The lesson

Practice taking conscious ownership of the things you can handle – and purposely giving away the rest to Something Bigger. Scary? You bet. But it’s worth it. It’s clutter-clearing for the spirit.

Thoughts? Yeah, buts? Me toos?

39 comments

Not too long ago, we talked about keeping your sanity at the holidays. Basically, when there’s more to do than usual, something’s got to give. If your list of to-dos doesn’t match up with reality, you will run out of  time and/or energy before it’s all done.

It’s totally human to just keep piling on the “yeah, sure, I’ll do thats” without checking to see whether they line up with reality. Unfortunately, this habit also makes you a pre-holiday spaz.

See, overwhelm is a product of being unconscious about your agreements with yourself (and others). If you create awareness, the overwhelm can dissipate.

Shed a little consciousness on the next week.

Feel like doing a little activity?

• Grab a piece of paper or use the comment box below
• Write down how you’d like to feel this holiday (peaceful, happy, calm, etc.)
• Write down the things you want to accomplish before Christmas Eve (business, personal, etc.)
• Look over the list
• Cross off anything that doesn’t bring you closer to how you want to feel this holiday.

This may seem harsh, but it will help you prevent the overwhelm of having so much to do in a short period of time. It will also prevent the collapsed feeling that often follows.

Tomorrow begins my 16- day vacation. Soon, yours will begin too. What will you consciously cut out so you can have the kind of holiday you truly want?

4 comments

Money woes are rampant these days and everyone I know is doing circus-quality juggling of work, life, kids, family, and precious little self-care time. Overwhelm reigns.

In the midst of our collective stress, pausing mid-week for “thanks” rings false. Just ick. Like a syrupy-sweet greeting card complete with fuzzy-focused hearth fire and cornucopia nearby.

If being thankful feels forced to you right now, it’s okay. You’re not alone. In fact, you’ve got lots and lots of company.

Gratitude logjam

When you get stuck, even with something like gratitude, one of the best things you can do is start small. Like, really small.

For example, here are some of the small things I’m grateful for:

• A headset that actually works (Plantronics, if you’re wondering)
• Running water
• The big bag of string cheese in the fridge
• Gmail
• Sweatpants
• allrecipes.com
• The trash hauler who works our stretch of rural highway

I could have listed bigger things, but these are what feel true today, right now. Locating a small amount of gratitude within you is like finding a vein of gold in the earth – it runs deep. But you don’t have to *start* deep. Just start where you are.

If you say, “I’m so overwhelmed right now, I don’t feel grateful for anything. Just my lungs.” That’s okay. In fact, it’s perfect. Just start with that.

The thing about gratitude.

Most people experience gratitude as effortful – as something you “should” feel. Something you must pull out of yourself. Forcing thanks feels like cold extruded plastic instead of a comforting cotton-silk blend.

Honest, genuine gratitude nourishes your heart. It gives you energy, rather than extracting it from you.

Instead of forcing yourself to feel grateful, I invite you to consider starting where you are.

Is there a small thing you feel grateful for today (even if you think it’s something not worth mentioning)?

21 comments

It might seem ironic that “the most wonderful time of the year” strikes fear and dread in so many hearts.

Shall we explore why? Let’s start with a fun little pie graph.

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Let’s say that this is an image of what an ideal day looks like for the average creative person. You might not agree with everything there, but it’s a stand-in for the kind of life you’d like to have. Balanced, fulfilling, sane.

With me so far?

Okay, good. Let’s say that you have this balanced schedule in mind most of the time as your ideal in life.

Lots of perfectly intelligent people believe they can keep the same schedule while also entertaining, traveling, shopping for gifts, etc. It’ll all work out somehow. “Oh, I’m planning to work on my So-And-So and finish it over the holiday break.” (Sound familiar?) And then January 1 rolls around and they’re internally thrashing themselves for not having completed anything.

Forgetting reality

Time is kind of like the Pauli exclusion principle: two objects cannot occupy the same space at the same time. You can’t be working 100% on your business when you’re trying to relax and visit.

The chart above is a circle to represent the fact that there are a finite number of hours in the day. 24 to be exact. In that first wheel, the “work” slice of time has 8 hours. Now, in the big holiday celebration scenario, watch what happens:
.

There’s still balance, it’s just different balance. Work goes down to a measly 3 hours. Instead of solid productivity, those work hours might be an hour here, 30 minutes there checking email.

The trade-off? All the other fun things like more time with family and friends! More yummy food and hanging out snacking on hors d’ouvres! Yay for holidays!

Then why does it feel so not-fun?

Holiday stress comes from not knowing how you’ll fit it all in. From rushing in blindly with a can-do-attitude. You can’t have all those activities and a normal work life. Or you’ll spend half of January recovering.

You can’t. You can’t fit it all in. There isn’t enough time.

So, let’s suppose that you want to enjoy your break and work less (or not at all). If that’s true, then lower your standards. Cut in half (or more) whatever it is you’re planning to do work-wise over the holiday break.

This way, you actually get a chance to be where you are. You can actually enjoy the people you’re with. You might be truly present (what a gift!) and even relax for a change.

Holiday “breaks” don’t happen by themselves.

You have to treat your holiday break like a pie. (Mmmm. Pie…)

Imagine your ideal work day as a yummy pie – and then imagine using a lovely silver serving utensil to cut out a slice. Decide how big a portion of spaciousness you want. Go ahead.

Decide now what work and to-dos are optional before it starts getting crazy. Then set that slice of work aside. It’ll keep. When the holidays are over you can munch on it all you like.

Persuaded?

What will you cut out over the holidays so you enjoy them more? And for bonus points, do share what kind of pie you’d like to have!

One comment

I’ll bet that you’ve “gone and done it” at least once in your life, too.

Forgot an appointment?

I did. This morning. With my awesome, amazing, quirky, totally-integruous CPA and friend, Dale Kennedy.

Dale’s my Dad-away-from-Dad. He talks sense to me about planning and money in his inimitable humorous, ADD way. He peppers me with questions – and I’d better be on my toes with good answers. He cracks me up but he means business – and I’m touched that he’s genuinely interested in how I and my business are doing. Every time I see him he asks me, “Have you read Rich Dad, Poor Dad yet?”

I love this guy. I never knew an accountant could be so fun. So real. So human.

Dale is busy, but he made an informal breakfast appointment with me just to catch up at one of my favorite restaurants.

The glitch.

I’ve been on the edge of stress lately and, without checking my calendar, I gave myself permission this morning to stay in bed with my coffee and read. A mental health hour.

I felt sooo soothed and nurtured by this little pocket of time for myself.

If you’re paying attention, you’ll have caught the glitch above: I didn’t check my calendar. I usually check tomorrow’s calendar in the evening to avoid this very situation. But I didn’t.

I also ignored that little niggle in my stomach while I sipped my coffee that said, “Are you sure you have nothing scheduled this morning?”

At 8:15, I sat down at my calendar and the reality hit me: I was already 15 minutes late – and a half-hour’s drive from our meeting place. I said aloud, “[Expletive]!” And then, “[Stream of expletives]!”

And then I called Dale.

Forgiveness: the moral of the story

The first thing he said to me was, and I quote, “Be at peace.” Seriously. I was so stressed and worried that I offended him – and I felt so badly imagining him sitting by himself at the restaurant – and he tells me to be at peace.

Dear reader, this time the lesson’s on me. While I’m constantly talking about offering yourself compassion for mistakes, this time Dale gave it to me instead. When he could have been justifiably irate. I’m humbled and grateful.

Big thanks to Dale. I hope his “found” 45 minutes were relaxing and productive.

The bonus lesson

One of my twitter buddies said to me this morning, “No one trusts a perfectly organized organizer!”

I guess this makes me trustworthy.

No matter how mortified I feel about missing my breakfast with Dale, the truth is we all forget stuff. Even me. We are all busy, distracted, and trying to make our way the best we can.

We’re all also learning as we go. You’re learning, I’m learning.

My bonus lesson from this is to listen to my intuition. It’s usually right.

What’s your bonus lesson?

6 comments

The “What do YOU do?” series invites you to share your organizing insights and ideas and gives you a glimpse into my life as a messy, creative person. Jump in – you’re an expert on your own experience.

It’s the first Monday of November, folks. (How on earth did that happen?)

Now that there’s a mere 9 weeks until the end of the year, many self-employed business owners are doing an end-of-year cram session – trying to finish everything they hoped to do in 2009. Admittedly, I feel tempted to do the same. I get this feeling that I’m running out of time.

You too?

If you’re feeling end-of-year panic, take a breath or two or three. Good long slow ones. None of us is really running out of time. December 31 is just a day – in a long string of many days.

This time of year there’s a focus on the home fires, of gathering and connecting. It doesn’t mesh well with attempting to push through tons of work. So finding a balance is key.

Setting end-of-year goals for 2009

What is currently working well for me:

Being kind to myself. A while back, I made it my intention to treat myself (in my business) the way I would a paid employee. Would I ask an inspired helper to cram? No. Would I ask them to work holidays? No. Would I encourage them to take time off? Of course. So that’s how I’m treating myself. Hard? Yes. : )

Having realistic expectations of myself. I’ve learned over the years that I don’t focus well on my work when I’m preparing for the holidays. So I’m dialing back on the work load for Thanksgiving and taking almost 2 weeks off over Christmas and New Years. That’s a huge shift for me.

Choosing only one end-of-year goal. Truthfully, I have many goals but I wrote all of them down and just chose one for the end of the year. The others I put on the back burner. There’s no point in forcing them all. And I may actually have a chance of getting that one done.

Giving myself permission to rest. This is probably the hardest thing because somewhere inside me is this belief that if I have free time, I “should” be working. But as I found out in September, taking time to rest actually filled up my heart and spirit and gave me all kinds of energy and creativity.

I know this resting stuff is a hard sell for you diligent worker bees – especially if you’re strapped for cash. You think, “I can’t stop – or everything will fall apart.” But consider it.

What I’m currently working on:

Setting aside the time. The only way I really honor my need for rest is by actually putting it in my calendar. By blocking it out, I literally cannot make appointments with others. It’s that visual reminder that I need.

So, I’m going to block out the holidays/breaks I’ve chosen today – before it all runs away with me.

My goals for 2009

• Business: Release the new top-secret product to my newsletter subscribers.
• Business: Continue blogging and writing the newsletter.
• Business: Prepare for my time off so I can really enjoy it.
• Personal: Take off Thanksgiving week and December 21 – Jan 3.
• Personal: Fill up. Be silent. Journal. Pray. Meditate. Soak in all the love.

How about you?

Please share:

1. What’s going well in your end-of-year goal setting ?
2. What are you working on that you’d like to be better?
3. What are your actual goals for the rest of 2009?

Your comments on your own process are welcome. House rules: Give advice to me or others only when it’s specifically requested. This makes exploring safe and learning possible for every reader.

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